Posts Tagged ‘responsibility’

The perpendicular Universe choices

Life puts you in places. In situations you have no control over. In limelight at times, where your say would eventually wrap things up. In moments, when the world will wait for you. For your first step in a direction conceived in your head. For they have a walk in their legs too, but they are impatient to follow yours. Where you are the vanguard. You are the leader. Your word is the word.

At such an hour, you can’t afford to fumble. You just can’t freeze. It is at those junctures you look at the crowd in the dark, holding their breath, counting on you, and you wonder, “What if I mess it up?” What if I screw their lives?” The world depends on you. People look up to you. With so many piercing eyes of hope, you are bound to dwindle.

Take a deep breath and just dive. You don’t know where it will take you. You don’t know how deep it will push you, and you might fall and fall and fall. But remember it was all yours – The decision to take that plunge. So take responsibility, and steer things in the right direction.

You gotta do it. Take a shot! Unflinchingly. Stand true by the plan your head cooked up in the first place, and stick to it.

Don’t look back! Don’t ever regret! In the far off future, if you get a chance to introspect, don’t ever think about the other option. Don’t even spend a thought on the road you left intact. Just say: “That was it! And I took it.”

It is the right way to live, and abate dispensable worries. You see, things like regrets always pull you down. They have hooks that are forever attached to you. With every decision you make, your fidgeting gives birth to another. As you move forward it will only slow you down. You will be compelled to wade with all your might, and it will be hard to make it, with all the weight pulling you down.

Forget options like they were ever there and you might end up loving yourself even more.

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The Perpendicular Universe The Cubicle

I dream for an open field. There is a wild run in me. But there is no ground to tramp on. I don’t see it. Even if it is there, I am blind to it.

My life is a cubicle. It begins in walls and ends right there. I am bound by the charms of the green. But I wish it was a meadow, and that I was free to gallop wild. Free to dart my way to search the end of it.

Every day begins with me trying to adjust my fading eyes to a computer screen. I am locked. I am compelled to. There is no escape from the life I have chosen. If there is, then maybe I am blind to that too. Or pretending that I can’t see, because I have a sea of responsibilities to swim into. Or make a living out of this dead.

Day in and day out I follow the same ritual of turning the office desktop on, checking my mails for updates, attending meetings to show the ground I have covered, having lunch when I am not hungry, making small talks that are pointless and will be forgotten, working like a workhorse to make people in the other corner of the world happy, living a misery to help build someone something I don’t give a shit about, slaying the universe’s most useful gem – time just so that everything moves on and I age to perish one day, and then repeating the whole cycle again because there is no end to this.

What I live is misery. This is someone else’s dream. I am the tiniest mote to him. It wouldn’t matter to anyone if I fall one day. They will have someone to replace my body. Because my mind doesn’t reach anywhere. It is being forced to run in a mill, where churning thoughts is a curse and of no use to anyone.

I can feel the force of this psychotic world pulling me down. This isn’t gravity, No! This is the worst. It keeps on pulling you, one piece at a time, till there is nothing left. If you had a dream it would make sure you lose your mind. It would subject you to so much pressure that you would forget life is supposed to be easy. It would swallow you in its jaded shenanigans that you would not remember what real fun is supposed to be like. It would drown you into its silent waters, take you deep down to hell, and you would never know if there was supposed to be a heaven too.

I just wish there was no one that pulled my strings. That I create something because I feel like building. That I eat because I feel hungry. That I dance because I feel like dancing. That I look at a screen because I wish to surf and have fun. That I check my mails to see another world. That I play because I feel like having a blast. That I have talks that numb minds and emanate something useful every time I do. That I pamper myself because I deserve it.

But alas! I am stuck in a cubicle. My life is it.